What are these (imagine me making air quotation marks) light ones you ask? Things that everyone else seems to have learned during childhood that escaped me. I'm sure you also have a list. Feel free to write about it. But now is the time to feel sorry for me and the things I was deprived by.
So here is the list of things I have never learned as a kid:
1. Ride a bike
2. Swim
3. Roller blade
4. Skate
5. Bowl.
I know, I know, these are horribly... oh I don't know, what's the word... shallow? haha. For some. But hey, for me? It made growing up a bit... challenging. Can you imagine not knowing how to ride a single bike? I had to say goodbye to what would have been romantic park stuff. I was stuck with the walking. And somehow that was boring compared to bike rides. It's not like I could ask for balloons and stuff while going around the park. It would seem more like a dude taking his little sister out to the park instead of a potential girlfriend yes?
Same goes for skating and the blades. And bowling. The whole swimming thing didn't stop me though. I still am as thirsty for the pool or beach or river as any regular swimmer. If not more. I'm just more paranoid and more... safety conscious. And just how sexy can you be in a bulky neon green life jacket... but then I think... it's ultimately more preferable to drowning. Nothing less sexy than a dead girl. Uhh. Hmmm. A bloated dead girl. (I feel the need to clarify because nowadays lots of people find dead things sexy. Like uhm, vampires. AND those wierdoes with the whole necrophilia thing. So anyway, drowned dead self not sexy. Although neon green life jacket not sexy as well.
So. I have learned to compensate by finding activities not involving the five. Like, food, movies and karaokes. Still it's unhealthy. Right? It promotes a sedimentary life style?
5. Bowl.
I know, I know, these are horribly... oh I don't know, what's the word... shallow? haha. For some. But hey, for me? It made growing up a bit... challenging. Can you imagine not knowing how to ride a single bike? I had to say goodbye to what would have been romantic park stuff. I was stuck with the walking. And somehow that was boring compared to bike rides. It's not like I could ask for balloons and stuff while going around the park. It would seem more like a dude taking his little sister out to the park instead of a potential girlfriend yes?
Same goes for skating and the blades. And bowling. The whole swimming thing didn't stop me though. I still am as thirsty for the pool or beach or river as any regular swimmer. If not more. I'm just more paranoid and more... safety conscious. And just how sexy can you be in a bulky neon green life jacket... but then I think... it's ultimately more preferable to drowning. Nothing less sexy than a dead girl. Uhh. Hmmm. A bloated dead girl. (I feel the need to clarify because nowadays lots of people find dead things sexy. Like uhm, vampires. AND those wierdoes with the whole necrophilia thing. So anyway, drowned dead self not sexy. Although neon green life jacket not sexy as well.
So. I have learned to compensate by finding activities not involving the five. Like, food, movies and karaokes. Still it's unhealthy. Right? It promotes a sedimentary life style?
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